Six Hundred Sixty Six Hundred Sixty Days

Desert Wind and A Perverse Desire To Win, History Buried in Shame.

" Hate is a strong word
But I really, really, really don't like you

This poorly puncuated rant is for you. You can tell something is up because usually I am anal-tastic about things like grammar. Thanks.


You.. I can't believe it. As soon as I think we are just friends again, bang! I get hit with liking you again which is totally obsurd! When Jana said that I would always like you for the rest of my being, when she rambled on and on about how we will both like each other but never act on our feelings and then be 50 and married and still love each other, I thought she was crazy. But noooo.. Now as I am getting really close to a guy I thought I really liked, you just strolled in again! It takes alot to make a girl cry when you didn't even do anything wrong! And Jesus, coming over and just being here.. On my bed and in my pantry and so close to me and so wonderful and seeing me in my dress and looking at me and wearing my jewlery and being on my bed.. on my bed! I will never stop thinking about you now! Are you just being the good friend with me I know we are? Or is this something more? And Jesus boy, I like someone else! I have been working SO hard and now you have just stolen me away! Good grief and a half why can't I just have a love life like Nicole's? Simple enough, right? bleckaoaoiej10a=aQ$j!!!!

Thanks for working your way back into my head, you crazy wonderful horrid strong asshole gorgypants you."

Standing on The Edge of Morning, Scent of Sex and New Found Glory

"Good friends, what a blessing. I have so many great friends in this world. Ones who make me smile not just when I am down, but when I am up. Ones who say nice things to me, even when I don't need it. Ones who will buy me presents and tell me jokes, who compliment me and love me. All of me. And that is something I wouldn't give up for the world.

Anna= Well it isn't MY fault that you are pregnant!
Siobhan= Yes it is! If you hadn't ever slept with my boyfriend, I wouldn't have slept with your dad!"

Lights Break Under A Heavy Door, And I Try To Keep Myself Awake.

"I like getting to know people in a vulnerable state.
When they are free of shell,
The things they hide behind,
And protect themselves with.
They protect their self esteem
Protect their being
And pick and choose what they want you to know.
And this is how I like to get to know people.
Because it is the most real way you can ever see someone.
It is the only way you will
See their insecurites
See their fears
See the things they dont want to see.
What is more real than that?

I love being able to talk to you
All night
For days in a row
Sometimes about silly things like
Our favorite song
Other times about serious things
Like our lives
But what I love the most
I love it the most when you make me
Speechless"

But There You Go For The Last Time, I Finally Know Now What I Should Have Know Then.

"Don't you understand that those girls aren't the right ones for you?

Can't you see that I am nice, funny, wonderful?

Can't you see that they are bitchy, rude, and horrible girlfriend material?


I think maybe
Just maybe
You should pick me"

Oh no, don't let me go for this.

"Well, it seems we are more similar then i have assumed.

I might be a fool
You might be one too
Maybe we're all that we needed.
Two wrongs don't make a right
But I don't care tonight
Maybe we're all that we needed.

Those make me think of you and I. So much."

And I, I Am Not Into, The Idea Of Being Without You.

Friends + The Zoo = Intense Awesomeness

Hours pass, but she still counts the minutes that I am not there.

"Of course, not everything can be as easy as cutting and glueing.
For example, the heart is not as easy as people say it is.
It can make you do things out of character.
Like things in the dark.
It can make you fall for unexpected people.
Like an old enemy.
Or you may make you sad because unexpected people may fall for you.
Like a best friend.
So why can't everything be as easy as cutting and glueing some newspaper and photos?
Well, where is the fun in that?

Where is the challenge that makes it so much more worth it?"

My rhyme ain't good just yet, my brain and tongue just yet, and they ain't friends so far, my words don't travel far.

I kindof want to paint this on my wall. Or something like it. It would rock.

We'll Make The Great Escape.

"There comes a time when you are truly blissful.
Walking in the cold,
music blaring,
you think to yourself
'This is the first time in a long time I have nothing negative running through my mind.'
You turn the music up a little louder, trying not to lose this
empty, happy mindless state. You have missed this ridiculous state of happiness .
You get lost in the words,
the sentences,
the way it connects with your life. Nothing stops you from being happy and unfocused.
You have no thoughts, you connect with the singer. He is your mind, yelling
about matresses in your basement,
a great escape,
or being saved.
Then you turn it down. You do it cautiously.
You are afraid the thoughts will creep back, you are afraid to ruin this intimate moment with yourself,
but you have to see.
Quieter,quieter it goes.

Then silence.

You open your mind again.
Let the music slip away.
Then you have it. You know it.
They are gone.
The thoughts, worries, insecurities.
You are happy.
There is nothing wrong, and everything seems right.
That is true bliss.
Then, you turn the volume up.
And up,
up,
up.

You smile and continue your walk in the cold."